Several years ago I asked a friend to design a logo for me for a special project. The logo was fantastic, the project bombed. It started with Sacred Self; that’s all I really knew…the double S’s appeared to me in a DNA double helix design and was light filled. Paul, my magic making logo designer, created the shape, the prismatic rainbow light and shine. I knew it had to do with our earliest beginnings, a core pattern that underpins a sacred quality of light, like stained glass church windows, on a cellular level. So now I had a logo and just as a good logo should do, it compelled me to action. The logo called me in to work with it and had always seemed to whisper a secret to me. I kept trying to listen and I got clues. Sacred Self, Sacred Soul, Sacred Seed? Yes, it was all that and more. And all would go quiet again for a time.
In time it occurred to me that the special project was in fact me, not something I had to do for others. At the time I was just beginning to understand “sacred” as a quality to being; that all of life and all expressions of creation have an intrinsic value that is sacred and that we are all shamefully disconnected from this phenomena of ‘Sacred’. It had taken me years to surrender to the fact that my brain was not going to answer my deepest longings, loneliness, and fear. I’d really thought I could think myself happy and safe. It dawned on me that my worries, anxiety and stress had rooted in a deep, dark, mucky place within me and they wouldn’t un-root through hope. My conundrum was that I was naturally a hopeful person, with an optimistic outlook. Up until my mid thirties I thought this was a matter of perspective, a condition that developed out of years of positive thinking training and applied metaphysics. It was logical to me to focus on the positive – after all focusing on the negative just resulted in more pain. It was as simple to me as determining not to cry over spilled milk and setting your focus on the bright side. I believed fully that I had pulled it off, and so, unconsciously, my heart and brain continued to war and navigate me through my world alternately through filters of despair and optimism. I stumbled around in a paradoxical state for years. Possibility collapsing into despair which in turn collapsed into possibility. And some more time went by.
One night as I sat in on a transition town meeting people were lamenting how few people were actually using blue boxes and actively participating in recycling. In that moment I realized that people weren’t ever going to change their outer habits until they could profoundly grasp that they were sacred beings and in a symbiotic sacred relationship with earth. That the earth was an extension of themselves and visa versa. This thought got my attention. So what did that mean really? It’s not the plastic that has to be managed – it’s the acceptance of life being sacred that had to be embodied which perhaps then could allow there to be a functional alternative to plastic period. The light brightened and some of the muck dried up.
I’m not a religious person, never have been. I long ago established myself as a deeply spiritual person decidedly determined not to pay homage to any god/goddess type figurehead of any description. My everyday spirituality has nothing to do with the heavens and everything to do with the blessed earth. My spirituality starts and ends in the dirt. It’s visceral. I resonate with trees, plants, rocks, birds, animals and the elements. My spirituality is rooted firmly in my connection to all things of this realm of reality. In nature I witness magic and miracle, perfect order, mathematical precision, evolution, death and re-birth. Through nature I have learned about communication, consequence, relationship, compassion, listening, kindness, trust, surrender, faith and love. Although I love the use of metaphor and mythology to illustrate a great teaching I don’t need a religious hypothesis to explain my existence. I am here simply because it was my time to be here. I arrived in perfect timing and I will exit this life in perfect timing as will and do we all, contrary to what our hearts wishfully desire. I am a synergistic expression of all life and consciousness as it is continuously creating and unfolding in harmony with all other life at this time. Perhaps one day I will feel compelled to reach to the heavens for answers but for now I have enough to contemplate witnessing the world I walk in. And I am grateful, so very grateful. This is not a giving thanks kind of gratitude toward a deity for blessings received. This is a well-spring of energy that is powerful and dynamic and causes my heart to swell. Gratitude is a condition that becomes noticeable through heartfelt appreciation. It flows upward from the earth through my feet, to my heart and out into my universe. I offer this force of energy with intention back to life as nurturing creative juice via my thoughts and my actions. My spirituality is grounded in wonder and awe of the incredible synchronized interplay of intent, free will and action of all conscious life forms and sentient beings.
In my evolving growing spirituality I feel as deeply affected by a butterfly flapping its wings on the other side of this beautiful planet as I do a new seedling shooting up toward the sun deep in the rain forest as I do a fellow human being or animal being experiencing being slaughtered mercilessly in some unnamed nation. What is in one is in all, what affects one affects all. Just as my state of mind and heart affect them. These are sacred relationships. I know I am never without company, I am never alone or just me. My mind can easily separate me from all else, isolate me if I need to be and pretend that I’m a rogue aspect independent of all creation but through my heart I feel deeply my connection to all life. When I allow my awareness to tap into that sacred matrix of energy mysteries unravel, secrets are revealed, emotions and experience become shared, I become cognizant of a sacred spirit that flows endlessly and is homogenous to all creation.. I get to know what you know. That is a sacred relationship. Through my sacred relationships I contribute to and perpetuate a sacred spirit that is omnipotent.
Sacred Spirit runs timelessly and tenaciously connects us all in one thread, interlocking our fates as one with this earth of ours. A sacred energy born of you and me and all other forms of life that in a single breath unites our destiny.
This morning I was reminded in reading an interview that the fate of our civilizations and humanity will not be saved even if every one of us practiced good sustainable actions. And in that I was reminded again that only by welcoming and stepping into a sacred relationship with sacred spirit can we regenerate our world and only then will it matter.